Saturday, November 6, 2010

Way to ruin the good streak...that lasted all of two and a half total days...

FEEL FREE (by free I mean, actually please do...skip this!)TO SKIP THIS if you are following me, because this is just me yelling and ranting again and there is no point in reading it... Thank you and please carry on...

I am so fed up with life! I swear, every time I start to enjoy myself again, the roller coaster named "Life" takes yet another downward spiral and halts. You know, like when your on a ride at the amusement park and your having so much fun and suddenly the ride comes to a screeching halt and goes down for maintenance while your still on it. Well, yep that is what my life is like, and it's a solo ride of all things. The ups last only a couple of days or even minutes while the droll and annoying maintenance periods last months. No lie. I could say I hate my life, but that would not be entirely true.

I love my art, my obsessions and hobbies (that's a lot to keep me busy), my kitty, my family (when they are not at each other's necks and causing drama and LOTS of headaches), and my lovely friends (I miss you all so so so much, you have no idea. Halloween was amazing!). That's about it (in a general nutshell)! If I did not have these, I don't know what I would do and what point there would be! Oh and let's not forget my (few) followers! <3 you guys!

But I furking LOATHANDHATEWITH ALL OF MY BEING; Work, my parents petty arguments with me or each other, stupid people, people that make a point to get under my skin and pick on (and/or) threaten me when I retaliate, the lack of muse, lack of interesting things, lack of time, and the neverending story of drama from school, work, homework, life, ect... Oh and the wonderful thing called chronic depression which I think I have because all of these small things end up becoming so huge in my mind that I end up crying for an hour. No exaggeration. I hate being stuck like this and I hate having this sort of negativity around me and I especially hate when people want me to say sorry to them, when I never get a sorry in return...

I wish people would just choose between hating me and actually SHOWING me that they care about me, not just the petty little drama that they bring to me so they can get a consoling hug. That is my new pet peve. That is all, ado

1 comment:

  1. I hope you feel that your parents show you enough love! If not then we need to talk little lady! LOL As for petty arguments they will always happen when you live together its just part of life and getting a better understanding of each other.

    Squnches my heart!